Relationship Intelligence


Intelligence types and its impact on relationships & human life as a Whole

This article is far-far beyond the scope of IQ & EQ.

Here we are considering all those intelligences that have the most profound influence in our almost all the important aspects of life.

The difference between intelligence & intellect

An intellectual is the one who is book-wise, theoretical, impractical & conceptually solid.

Intelligence on other hand is practical, common-sensical & sub-conscious tool to identify and choose the best option.

Intelligence is the ability we have, to gauge, analyze, prepare & respond in the most appropriate manner to gain the best advantage as your capability in that respective area.

Most of us believe that high levels of intelligence are more the result of nature, rather than nurture. But that's just not the case as you find people who had the odds stacked against them and went on to do brilliant things.

Intelligence is developed through our life experiences & can be developed by practice, but it is a sub-conscious & inherent trait.

People aren't born smart. When people learn how to work with what they've got and with scarce resources, overwhelming limitations - They become smarter.

We will be using intelligence, smart or smartness, interchangeably as both are same & both are internal quality

Types of Intelligence

  1. Communication & Conversational Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  2. Social Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  3. Spiritual Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  4. Financial Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  5. Entrepreneurship & Business Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  6. Happiness Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  7. Romantic Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  8. Relationship Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  9. Satisfaction Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  10. Creative, Innovative Problem solving Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  11. Time Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  12. Visualizing Emerging Trend Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  13. Conflict resolution Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity
  14. Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity of Humor, Sarcasm, Wit
  15. Fear & risk Taking Intelligence, Smartness & Maturity

Let us define few important & not understood Smartness or Intelligences

Elements of Romantic Intelligence

To be successful in love is to be successful in life. Most of us know people who have been very successful at work but whose lives we would not want ourselves

  1. Knowing yourself & knowing what type of Man/Woman would make a good partner to you - Choose a person who feels loved and supported by both parents. Our partner’s relationship with his or her parents can be a trusted indicator of how frustrating or fulfilling our relationship can be. Our relationship with same gender parents would many times decide whether we would be great partner or not for our spouse
  2. Learning to know the difference between Love, Infatuation or Liking
  3. Knowing the difference between making love & having sex
  4. Knowing & practicing the art of intimacy of Emotional, Mental & Physical nature
  5. Understanding the need to talk about issues and problems
  6. Understand the importance of being heard & acknowledge for all the concerns and doing the same for your partner
  7. Putting your partner’s satisfaction, happiness & needs above yours
  8. Getting ourselves evaluated for any emotional dysfunction which may possibly contribute to the demise of our long-term relationship
  9. Identify & accept the difference between needing someone[negative] & loving someone[positive]
  10. Not making your partner dependent to your happiness & satisfaction

Elements of Relationship Intelligence

Our society puts a huge emphasis on book smarts and IQ, but our relationships effect a much bigger part of our lives.

Strong relationships improve our immune system and help combat disease, as Loneliness and weak relationships are one of the major sources of stress, health problems and depression.

  1. Respecting yourself
  2. Loving yourself
  3. Accepting yourself as you are with your strengths & weaknesses
  4. Respecting others
  5. Not holding resentment
  6. Not pre-judging others based on earlier experience or perspective
  7. Not letting problems multiply by avoiding but resolving at the initial stage itself
  8. Letting your partner express meaningfully without overriding. It is not about going along meaningless blabbering which is a repeat every time filled with blame & accusations & threats
  9. Not showing contempt for anything in your partner’s background. It is about accepting him/her as she/he is after choosing
  10. Focusing on feelings & actions
  11. Knowing how & when to apologize
  12. Knowing the distinction between the best interest of the relationship & self-interest of yourself
  13. Placing your partner in the position of most valued, without sacrificing your self-respect, your dignity, or your own valid needs
  14. Identifying the real caring people and sticking with them
  15. Getting rid of toxic people out of your life as soon as possible
  16. Knowing the importance of the need to nurture the relationship & your own role & responsibility
  17. Resolve to work on the relationship through the toughest part & giving up only when all the avenues have been tested & been exhausted
  18. Knowing & doing the importance of standing up for your partner& supporting when there is the need

 Elements of Happiness & Satisfaction Intelligence

  1. Paying attention to here & now, rather than postponing the happiness or satisfaction to future events
  2. Letting go of troubled past & being active in the present
  3. Having only those friends and people around who make you feel great & good about yourself
  4. Having a strong & supportive social community of network
  5. Retaining & sharing the happy memories
  6. Knowing & taking action towards their passion
  7. Listening to others but living life as per their dreams
  8. Feeling happy & contended with the everyday small-small achievements & accomplishments, rather than focusing on once in a blue moon big successes
  9. Identifying & knowing what is more satisfying, the materialistic fulfillment or the bliss that comes from the satisfaction of core through the end values like Happiness, Love, Relationship, Adding Value & Helping others
  10. Putting more emphasis on creating & making each moment memorable that collecting material possessions
  11. Prioritizing & doing more of long-term meaningful worthwhile goals rather than short spike of happiness
  12. Looking at the changes in a positive way & looking towards & making changes happen
  13. Making happiness, peace & satisfaction dependent internally and on ourselves & not relating it with other people, things or situations
  14. Learning to love ourselves unconditionally & enjoying being alone in our company
  15. Never compromising with what others have based on the outward their appearances & actions & expressions
  16. Feeling grateful
  17. Being humble in assumption that everyone can teach you something
  18. Recognizing the contribution of others & the benefits all our crisis, set-back, failures & mistakes brought us
  19. Making life simpler & avoiding complications
  20. Mediating & introspecting to understand & know ourselves better

Please Understand Happiness is a daily hard work

Elements of Social intelligence

  1. Social Awareness,How you respond to others
  2. Sensing other people’s feelings
  3. Listening with full receptivity, without filter to observe, notice & understand the unsaid
  4. Understanding others’ implicit thoughts and intentions
  5. Knowing how to have smooth, effective interactions
  6. Knowing how you come across
  7. Caring about others’ needs

8.   Adoptability to Adapt to the surrounding & different cultures comfortable


 Definition of Spiritual Intelligence

  1. Understanding the qualities and capabilities of our authentic self
  2. Understanding our inherent core values
  3. Understanding the deeper realm that gives us wisdom, compassion, integrity, joy, love, creativity, and peace
  4. Being aware of & living in presence for some time everyday
  5. Creating feeling awareness instead of thinking awareness
  6. Living life as per the point 3 above
  7. Learning to activate & balance whole brain faculties which includes the creative & logical part along with the other intelligence mentioned in this article
  8. Forgiving yourself & others, letting go of the past, being totally comfortable with what we are today
  9. Having fun in all aspects of your life work, family, social etc
  10. Learning the art of detached observation & disassociation through NLP to get rid of the pains & hurts of past
  11. Learning the art of reflection, introspecting & connecting with ourselves

Read about the 36 Types INTELLIGENCE In my other website Blogs through 

How to make great 1st Impressions
Relationship Patterns


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Thursday, 21 January 2021

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