What to do when your relationship is breaking down
When you begin Your relationship,both of you were so excited, full of future possibilities.
It went on nicely for some time.
Then slowly an argument, a quarrel, a dispute & a disagreement started taking now & then.
Now a days every time you talk it leads to fights making both of you tense.
Sometimes you wonder how you did not see these signs earlier. Why you made the wrong choice.
The situation has turned into one where either of you may be thinking of going your separate ways.
Or the relationship does not have any fire left. Your physical chemistry also have gone down drastically.
In this type of situation check the following to confirm your lingering doubts, especially when you see the sparks fading away, the bonds becoming loser, the relationship looks like dissolving
- 1.First take a break & calm down
- 2.Go for an objective introspection by being totally honest, without blaming anyone or anything
- 3.Assess whether it is a temporary patch or it has reached a dead end or a logjam
- 4.Identify your desires, ask yourself many times & then sleep over it many times, that do you really want the relationship to continue & work it out or you would be happy to let it go
- 5.In case you feel like keeping the relationship, find out your own role in this state of affairs & whether you are prepared to put enormous efforts needed to bring the relationship back on track
- 6.Identify whether your partner would also reciprocate by putting his/her part
- 7.Do you find your disputes are values based, these normally have no real solutions. Only what you can do is accept & adjust
- 8.Ask yourself what type of life you are looking for in future & whether that would be possible with your current partner knowing him/her so much
- 9.Also imagine, what would be your life without your partner & is that an appealing point
- 10.Once you reach your own decision, have a heart to heart with your partner in a calm manner
- 11.Acknowledge your true feelings
- 12.It is always best to break the news of break-up directly & in a straight forward manner. Without blaming
- 13.Even if it comes as a surprise to your partner, if he/she was not expecting it, it is still has to be done this way
- 14.Both of you have to deal with the pains of separation in your own way, heal & then move forward
- 15.In the emotionally charged moment, do not promise anything & take decisions rashly
- 16.Once you have taken the decision, do not go about blaming yourself
- 17.After the decision especially if you are at the receiving end of learning of break-up from your partner, do not nurture the illusion that your partner will become different person & come back to you
- 18.Do not be scared of getting into uncertainties as it would break the comfort zone. Life would be harder in many ways & better in some.
- 19.Seek support of your loved ones
- 20.Focus on the big things your future fulfillment