How to Identify if you are in relationship with a Toxic person - 37 Signs - And how they harms you
Manipulative and toxic people drain our resources, our energies and our enthusiasm.
This they do - by constantly pushing us to work harder and harder to please them by making us compromise more and more with our needs, desires and wants.
Their shouting, their show-off of power, their chest-thumping, their aggressions and their violence – is actually a mask and a façade to cover their own feelings and insecurities - because they feel bad about themselves and want to use somebody else to cover their own feelings of inadequacies.
All these people are deeply insecure people with lowest self-esteem, self-respect, self-worth and self-confidence etc. etc.
In fact the more - someone displays the aforesaid behavior – the more emotionally-insecure they are internally.
Their toxic behavior is just a mask or facade to hide their weaknesses – it is their way of getting even with the world which typically happen to be their closed and most caring people.
Many of the people we come across in life are annoying, difficult, demanding or plain unpleasant – but all of them are not toxic – They are just undesirable.
They actually help us improve ourselves – if we can learn how to handle them properly and effectively.
There are distinct differences between people who are harmful to our well-being and those who have a negative outlook because they struggling with sadness, failures, ill-fortune etc.
In this article we are talking about truly toxic people — the kind that infects, affects, impacts and make us feel worthless.
How to recognize Toxic people - These people could be narcissists, having Borderline Personality Disorder or having any other anti-social disorder.
37 Signs you need to spot and get rid of from your life – these harmful people
- They only call you when they want something from you
- They are only nice – when you can supply with something they are desperate about
- They won’t normally never show – any appreciation, acknowledgement and gratitude of what you have done for them – even if you have sacrificed your life for them
- Expecting reciprocation of help, support, understanding etc. from them – is like expecting males to get pregnant – in fact they would not even acknowledge your help or your efforts
- When they need something badly from you – they are all charms and when they don't need – you get ignored completely AND they drop you so suddenly that you get stunned
- The deadly-toxic ones can charm the pants-off anyone – this is one quality they have in abundance
- You get blamed even for things you are not connected with
- They put you down, insult you and make you feel horrible about yourself – publicly as well as when you are with them
- They pretend to be your friend and well-wisher – in the initial courtship period as well as when they need something from you
- You always feel bad about yourself when you spent time with them
- Whatever you say - they take it personally – even if what you said is not directed at them at all
- Even jokes which has nothing to do – they can turn it against you by creating a grudge
- Tantrums and drama are part of their behaviors whenever you are together
- They are very suspicious of you, your intentions and your actions
- They never accept their mistakes – even when it is evident
- In fact they may find a reason in their mistakes to blame you, e.g., I murdered that person because you did not do this for me
- They will never apologize or say sorry
- They will say sorry ONLY if they need you badly [and you have put your foot down and asking them for apology] – they will say sorry – BUT WHEN YOU ASK THEM SPECIFICALLY WHAT THEY ARE SORRY FOR – they will give you see through look
- You will find that - They are aggressively competitive and jealous of you and of your accomplishments
- If you do very well – it may only makes to increase their cruelty towards you
- They are never happy for you when good things happen - although in public they may show and tell others how happy thy are
- They will often backbite behind your back
- Every responsibility of making the life work with them – is in fact your responsibility – in their mind
- They will never ever commit for anything
- They will never ever accept their mistakes
- In case they accept their mistake - it would mean they are planning bigger trauma for you
- They will verbally tell that they understand you and your pains or anything – but they have absolute lack of empathy
- They use whatever you have shared with them in good faith – to use it against you and to make you feel guilty
- They can be so magnetically attractive – that you start feeling attracted towards them in such way – that even the thought of leaving them may fill you with hopelessness
- They may force you do things to get you into trouble
- They will always talk bad about others
- They will play the triangle of Victim – that of being a victim, a rescuer and a persecutors as per their situation
- They will try to cut you off from your close people and support lines
- They will threaten, shout, and even tell you that thy will kill themselves - if you don't do what they want
- They will constantly rake up the settled issues again and again
- They will always talk about in grandiose terms on how great they are
- They will also expect you to glorify them everyday basis
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